


Hellbent

by RainbowMage



Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Dark, Diary/Journal, Dungeons & Dragons Campaign, Eventual Romance, F/M, No Dungeons & Dragons Knowledge Required, Revenge, Triggers, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:34:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28057713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowMage/pseuds/RainbowMage
Summary: What am I willing to do since I've lost everything? Sometimes I ask myself this. Get the same answer every time. Let's just say I ain't stopping till I find the one I'm looking for and gut him like a fish.  A man like that doesn't deserve to live.





	Hellbent

I’ve decided I’m going to write about anything interesting that happens to me from now on. I don’t expect anyone to find my journal and read it. I’m not trying to tell my story. No, I’m just doing it since I heard writing might help me cope. I don’t expect it to help much though. Nothing else has, why should this? Eh, it’s worth a try anyway.

I’ve done many things over the years to make the pain go away. Ale and smokes are good distractions, so I’ve kept those up, but nothing else has done shit. I tried music and art but had no talent for either. Reading? I couldn’t sit still that long. Gambling? I found quickly it was unreliable. Cutting myself? Only made it worse. Opium? Made me dead to the world. Can’t kill a man when you’re dead to the world. 

Really, the only thing that’s truly helped is my bonded beast, Fidget. She’s an urvogel, or so I’m told. Some weird mix of a bird and a lizard with pointy teeth. I’ve been teaching her to speak better lately. She’s got the basics down but still can’t talk in proper sentences and sounds like a three-year-old. It’s fitting really. Fidget’s like a small child. Curious, full of wonder and joy at the simple things. How she ended up bonded to a grouch like me I’ll never know, but I don’t care either. Fidget reminds me that there’s still good in this wretched world worth killing for. 

I know that killing the one I seek won’t make everything better, but it will ensure others don’t suffer the same way I did. At least, that’s what I tell myself. Fact is, I’m still a killer for hire. Bounty hunter, contract killer, hitman; pick your term, I’m one of those. Just a bad guy who kills worse guys, simple as that. No real point in changing that fact since I’m going to hell when I die anyway, so I might as well make money off being a bad guy. There’re only two kinds of jobs for people like me, soldiering and killing for coin. I ain’t cut out for the former since I don’t give a fuck about any wars going on, so, here I am. 

Anyway, I think I’ve said enough. From here I’ll just write whenever something interesting happens or I have a good conversation. Who knows, maybe this writing thing will actually be helpful. Haven’t gotten my thoughts down like this in a long time and am finding it cathartic, even after a few paragraphs. In any case, I’d better put down my pen now before I ramble more than I already have. Right now, there’s work to do.


End file.
